I'm so tired right now I can't really think straight. It's 10:00 and it's time for bed... I am tired of feeling tired and I'm tired of there not seeming to be enough hours in the day. I want to enjoy life and enjoy playing outside every single day with my kids - instead of doing housework - and so I do - but in the end I just feel really tired and really behind and like a really bad 'housewife.' My house is a mess most of the time - I can't see my kitchen table or my countertop and my junk drawer is so full of junk it's about jammed shut. It's annoying me like mad! But when the girls want to play outside in the evening and enjoy riding tricycles and throwing water balloons with their little friends, I give in and we play outside all evening, bonding with our nice neighbors and having fun. It's wonderful and with it being so close to September, I know that the end is near, of playing outside everyday.. so I always give in when it comes to playing and give up when it comes to cleaning. UGH. So here I sit... my brain fried and my muscles worn out. I may feel the same after cleaning the house, but at least I'd feel a sense of accomplishment, which may actually give me a shot of energy. :) Oh well. Tomorrow is a new day and I guess I'll just pray that somehow God will help me have fun with my children - letting them play - and yet at the same time also let me accomplish something around my house. I really need to... I'm going nuts here.
I still haven't even updated about 'life' lately in a long time and that bugs me... I love writing, or typing I guess, and it bugs me that I don't even have time for that! UGH!
Well, off to bed...
1 comment:
Hey Kim,
I struggle with the whole housekeeper thing too--it drives me nuts that my house isn't as clean as I'd like it, but I try to tell myself that in 20 years when R is grown and out of the house I'll not regret the time I spent with her, playing instead of cleaning, but I would regret it if I spent time cleaning and not playing with her. Make memories with your kids. It's what you'll all remember in the long run.
In the meantime, though, in the mornings I try to pick one or two things to accomplish each day (a load of laundry and getting the kitchen table cleaned off...or whatever). That way I've accomplished SOMETHING and have some sense of completion.
Hope that helps!
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